Believe it or not, David Gordon Green used to have credibility. His first few films were hard-hitting, critically acclaimed dramas. Films like GEORGE WASHINGTON, UNDERTOW, ALL THE REAL GIRLS and SNOW ANGELS. Haven’t seen any of those? Well, you should.

Then, he became one of the poster children for the douchebag comedy. He directed PINEAPPLE EXPRESS, a film that was a huge hit with stoners, wannabe stoners and people who want to be seen with stoners. He followed that up with YOUR HIGHNESS, a film that somehow roped in Natalie Portman and Zooey Deschanel despite playing like a 12 year-old homophobe’s mixing of HALF BAKED with DUNGEONS & DRAGONS. And then there’s THE SITTER. The less said about that the better. In between all of this, he also helped put on the show EASTBOUND AND DOWN, which many people swear is hilarious. I’ll take their word for it. I haven’t seen it, mainly because these same people also loved PINEAPPLE EXPRESS and YOUR HIGHNESS.

His recent film. PRINCE AVALANCHE, seems to be an attempt to marry his early dramatic work with his later comedic work. It’s got some decent notices, and I do hope it’s a return to form for Green.

But before that, he was attached to the remake of Dario Argento’s SUSPIRIA – a film pretty much every horror fan has decreed untouchable. Green tells, Esquire: “I don’t know if it’ll ever happen. Someone needs to do something very artful with that project. I’m just excited at the thought of making something elegant, and graphic, and classy at a point in the horror genre where everybody’s making films raw, and found-footage. I want something to contrast that, but anybody that’s interested in horror movies has no interest in that right now. At least, not with my involvement. But maybe someone else will do it.”

He goes on to talk more about SUSPIRIA, including ripping on people like me for being against the film before it’s made. Fair enough, but you have to admit we have plenty of historical evidence on why we would be wary of a horror remake of the most individualistic horror film ever made.

The SUSPIRIA remake is dead. But this project only ever seems to be dead for a short time before someone else comes up with an idea that makes studio execs salivate.